Slightly Off
by Bantam
Summary: Matt and TK are liven the bachelor life, but something's just not right with TK . . . and why does the apartment always smell so strange? Is it TK's gym socks? (This fic is odd . . . you've been warned)


**A/N: **_Well . . . I must warn you this fic is mighty odd . . . even for me . . . what can I say, I was inspired to do an evil TK fic . . . not really much to say . . . I think I scare myself. Ah well, read and tell me if you think I should continue with this warped semi humor or burn it snickers and never look back. Onward!_

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The acrid scent of burning hair and flesh filled the small room. A cool breeze drifted in through the open window, sending the sky blue curtains fluttering. It didn't help. A discarded lighter sat off to the side; for now it was forgotten as the boy sat on his haunches. The charred form in front of him wriggled in agony, weak squeaks sputtering from its tortured body. And the boy laughed.

Mercilessly he picked up a pencil off to the side and poked the near dead creature, taking joy from its frightened cries. Stupid hamster. He never liked it anyway. Maybe he should've tried the microwave . . . that would've been interesting. A bit messy though. The food would taste strange afterward. Another giggle came out of his mouth and he poked the rodent again. No response. Damn.

With a sigh he picked the thing up and stood in front of his window. Cautiously he peered outside and down at all the innocent people walking beneath. Damn them. A twisted grin worked its way onto his face as he dangled the body out the window. Its eyes blinked at him, and for a moment he felt something . . . it hadn't died yet? Ah well. His fingers moved apart as the animal plunged to land upon his carefully aimed at target. That little girl looked so cute with her pretty flower hat.

As he heard the high pitched scream from below he jumped away from the window and nearly clapped with glee. But alas, how was he to entertain himself now? Just then his bedroom door opened, and his older brother's nose wrinkled in disgust as he inhaled the stench. Damn. He'd been caught. Stupid hamster.

"Takeru, didn't you take care of your nasty gym socks . . ." He muttered as he looked around the room.

TK smiled his most innocent of smiles as he used his toe to shove a pair of dirty underwear over the charred spot on his carpet. Matt shoved a hand through his well groomed hair, and shook his head once he found what he'd been looking for.

"TK, if you wanted a smoke all you had to do was ask. And here I thought I'd lost my lighter again."

Yamato knelt down to pick up his lighter. The minute he had it in his hands he pulled his well packed cigarette box out of a pocket in his shirt and lit up a Newport. He then started to leave, but paused at the door, a curious look on his face.

"Did your hamster run away? I better not find it in my bed . . . you really need to do something about this room. God, the febreeze is in the bathroom" He complained as he took another drag and left the room.

The younger boy continued his ever-so-innocent smile, but a dark cloud passed over his face and turned it into something sinister. That's right bro. It ran away.

(«)

Yamato slumped down on the couch and flipped on the t.v. Strange kid. Very strange kid. Has he been eating too much sugar? Maybe he oughta stop letting him eat Cocoa Crispies for breakfast. That crap does stuff to ya.

_Flip! _Boring. _Flip! _Odd . . . _Flip! _The Wiggles . . .? What the! _Flip! _Jun loves Matt show . . . ugh . . ._Flip, flip, flip, flip_, nothing on the boob tube at all! For crying out loud, all that money he paid for cable and not a damn thing on!

Sighing, he reached behind him to the ashtray on the coffee table to put his cigarette out, but instead ended up putting another burnt spot on its dusty surface. It hadn't been the first time he'd missed.Well, he figured if he couldn't watch tv he might as well get something to eat. Food was good. The refrigerator was his friend.

Forlorn eyes stared upon the empty recesses of his beloved fridge. Nothing. All gone. Save for that box of leftover Chinese in the back. What was that green stuff growing out the sides? With a shrug he reached in and pulled it out. After sniffing it once, he ignored the fact that it smelled worse than his little brother's room and stuck it into the oddly smelling microwave. Everything smelled funky in that apartment. Good thing the only part of it the girls ever saw was his room while they were drunk. He loved the invention of alcohol.

With a beep of the microwave he removed the so called food that, if possible, smelled worse than when he pulled it out of the fridge, and took a seat at their kitchen (card) table. It wasn't so bad if you didn't breathe. Slippered feet scruffed absently against the dirty tiled floor as he munched on something crunchy . . . he wasn't sure it was supposed to be.

It was good to be a bachelor, and having his little brother trail along wasn't so bad. He loved the kid, real nice and innocent, a little off, but still a good kid. Most people would look upon their deplorable conditions and shudder; he knew their mother did, yet they were content. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, then find someone with vodka and make it a party! Hell yeah! Yamato grinned, though whether it was at this thought or to fight off the gag reflex was unknown.

The box was left forgotten upon the table as he shuffled off to his room to change. He was invited to a killer party and he was at least gonna look damn sexy before he got dead drunk. He paused as he stood in the corner of the kitchen, however. The cat's food dish sat untouched. Odd. Oh well, it probably ran away too. They sure did have a hard time in trying to keep animals sticking around.

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**A/N:**_ Not much to say, but if you finished this first tidbit kudos to you! Bwahahaha! By the way, the whole lemonade thing isn't mine. It belongs to Ron "Tater Salad" White. Tehe. Blue Collar Comedy rocks._


End file.
